Awe.

That's the state i've been in all day, awe. i should be in bed right now, and instead i find myself wanting to share a little of my personal life here, on this blog i mostly keep to art-related topics. i am a private, rather solitary person, always have been, and though i'm more than open with my close friends, i also tend to go within sometimes.

So, awe. Some friends of mine, wonderful, thoughtful and giving people that they are, got together and did an amazing thing for me. i've never met any of them in person; we speak strictly online or on the phone, and most of them i only met a few months ago. There's no need to go into details, but without my knowledge, they all joined forces to give me a very precious gift. Actually, they gave me two very precious gifts. Aside from physical gain, they also shook up my world, in a good way. i feel...overwhelmed by their kindness and their generosity, but mostly, and this is the thing that makes me burst into tears just to think of it, they found me to be worthy of such kindness. i am still, hours later, in humbled disbelief. This will stay with me for a long, long time to come. It is a deep reminder, amidst all the negativity thrown at us everyday, that people can amaze you, that life can amaze you, that at any moment, someone can offer you something without seeking anything in return, just so that you can have an easier go of it. i am more than grateful, especially for having even met them in the first place. 

(Thank you, guys. i love you.) 

Altered Book Round Robin

i'm still here! i want to update my blog more often, really i do, but it just seems to be put on the back burner over and over. However, i'm mostly not here because i'm busy making art, so i don't feel the least bit guilty...ok, maybe a little. 


i have ideas brewing for a post about fearless art journaling - not an original concept, but i want to offer tips and suggestions of my own to those who don't know where to start with the medium. i actually have a good chunk of the post already written up, just need to find time to finish it. i may use the post as a jumping off point for a swap on swapbot, so any followers here from sb who may be interested, be on the lookout for that!


So, how about some new art?

i joined an altered book round robin over at flickr, and that has been a lot of fun. If you'd like to see what our group is doing, check it out here. i am going to share here my own work, but there's great work to be seen by the other players over at our flickr group.

This is my book:

Front cover.

Inside cover/first page.

Second page/layout.

Third and last of my layouts.

The book is now being worked in by the other players. i chose this theme as a result of missing San Francisco. i haven't been able to get back since we left in 2003, and it eats at me. That place sticks with you, that's for sure.

Thanks for stopping by, and hopefully, i'll be back to post again before too long...

Pocket ATC

Hello, to those of you still reading my not up-to-date blog. The holidays had me on my toes, and it seems things haven't slowed down much since. i am still regularly making art, but finding the time to post it or write about it has been difficult. Here's a little snippet for today. This was for a swap entitled "Interactive ATC: Pocket". i love how it turned out, and my partner was very happy, so it's all good.



 These are the tags i made to slide in the pocket.

i love the softness of the colors, and a French vintage theme is always fun.

i hope to update this more, but you know how these things go...

Resolute.

i never make New Year's resolutions. Maybe i made a few a long time ago, i don't remember, but i just don't do it. i think it's because i strive (without always succeeding) to work on myself and set goals on a regular basis, not based on a date on a calendar. A fresh start can happen anytime, as necessary.


Having said that, i was thinking of resolutions today, and how most often, people's resolutions fall into similar categories:


* weight loss/diet/health
* job-related/financial success and well-being
* personal emotional improvement/changing bad habits
* personal goals for "more" - do more, make more, travel more, etc.


i'm sure there's more, but these were the ones i had in mind. i'd like to point out that i cheer for someone anytime they are trying to improve themselves or better their lives - we are all works in progress. But if i made resolutions, i asked myself, What would they be?


For one, weight loss is not on that list, though clinically, i am overweight, and according to textbooks, possibly "obese" (rolls eyes). Sure, i could stand to lose some weight. i'd probably have more energy (pity on those that know me and know i'm borderline hyper sometimes as it is). i'd find more clothes that fit well and i'd feel better wearing them. i'd probably have more spring in my step and a bit of a self-esteem boost. All good things.


But i know my body. i may be over my "ideal" size, but that size is not a 6, or 8. Or even a 10. As one of my friends said a long time ago, i'm "buxom". i have curves and i will not apologize. i also have a great love of preparing and eating delicious foods, foods my grandmother made, laden with carbs. i have Italian heritage - it would be akin to sacrilege to not partake of pasta. But the key, for me, is i love a variety of foods. A salad of fresh greens is high on the list of favorites, but so is mac and cheese. i love fruits and vegetables, but also most anything pork. i think moderation and variety are ideal. Plus, i make a lot of food homemade, and even if it's loaded with butter, at least there's none of those pesky preservatives or artificial colors and flavors.


So, weight loss would not be on my list. As far as financially, i'd love to have more money. Ofcourse i would! But i have a roof over my head, a fantastic art studio, and though my car is on its way out, there's little else i could ask for. A bigger travel budget would be nice... But i'm good.


Bad habits? Oh, yes. i have a few...and i'll take those one at a time, but they wouldn't really be on my list.


What would be on my list? First and foremost, being a better mom. Parenting is a learning process, and sometimes i joke that i'll have got it halfway figured out, maybe, by the time my son is 18. i want to be the mom my son needs me to be.


Second, pulling out the art that i know is inside me. As creative as i am on a daily basis, i always feel like there's much left unsaid, or unpainted/collaged/created. i may never get it all out, but i damn sure am going to try!


Third, being a kinder, more thoughtful, better person. Try to reign in anger, or expectation, or judgement. Be more self-aware of my effect on others and alter my actions to bring joy and gratitude and not disappointment or hurt.


And fourth, seek to find the joy in everyday, to always see the magic, even in the darkest fog (magic in itself), to live with passion and without restraint (except where it may hurt others), to enjoy this too brief life to the fullest.


i'm going to bundle that list together into one word - resolute. My resolution is to be resolute in who i am, what i believe, what i know to be right and what i hope to achieve in my life.


Thanks for listening. And happy new year's!

Hello, Mojo.

It seems that just the act of writing out my frustration here helped release the block i was feeling. It could also be looming deadlines that did it, or both. Whatever it was, hallelujah! i'm back in the flow.

Mostly i've been working on swaps, but also some Christmas cards for my mom, and an altered book for a round robin group i'm in on flickr. Generally, i feel most inspired in the fall/winter. i'm not sure exactly why...something about the cold. And even more so if it's overcast or raining or snowing. There's magic in making a hot cup of coffee on a late afternoon in the midst of winter, and walking into my studio ready to play.

And when it gets colder, i drink a lot more coffee. That evening cup is my favorite - that's when it tastes the best to me. Why does it taste better than in the morning? i've always wondered that.

Lately i've been making lots of ATCs, or Artist Trading Cards. It's been fun doing these little works of art, and many of the ideas put forth there will eventually be put onto canvas. i have an idea for a large piece to hang on the wall based on the ATC below.

i made this for a swap based on the Paleolithic era. i could have hand-drawn the images rather than carve, but i liked the idea of having these as little stamps. The title of the ATC is pretty obvious - "Cave Wall". Hey, sometimes you just gotta' tell it like it is, no muss, no fuss.

i love texture, and i love acrylic mediums. Here i used Liquitex Flexible Modeling Paste. i've only touched the surface of what it can do. Apparently, due to its flexible nature, i can use it on fabric. Oh, imagine the possibilities!

Ancient fish carving and wallowing in the mire

i have been working lately, but things are moving slowly. i don't know what's wrong with my creativity, but it's as if i can't count on my muses, as if i've lost some of my mojo. Artistically, 2010 was a full year for me, laden with discovery about myself as an artist, my style and my process. There was a distinct point in the spring where the ideas were pouring out of me, and i remember thinking, This is it! This is my voice! i may never be without an idea again! And really, right now, it's not a lack of ideas that's the problem, it's the implementation of said ideas. i sit down to work and everything feels wrong. i struggle with things that should be easy. i find myself stepping away from my studio after only a few minutes, and finding some other outlet, but this is eating up precious time i could be creating!

i am frustrated because i can't find the source of my frustration. i am struggling and i don't know why...

But, like i said, i am working. Every few days or maybe once a week i manage to create something i feel good or even great about, something i'm proud of, but this is not the norm unfortunately.

i know this is a phase. i know this too shall pass, but right now that doesn't make me feel much better.

These images show one of the few projects that wasn't a struggle recently. i carved the fish image (a depiction of ancient Mexican art) for an ATC swap with the theme of "ancient". This stamp is one of my favorite carvings that i've done to date. i have ideas for a series of carvings with a similar theme.

Included in each partners' swap (there were 2 partners total) was the ATC featured in the first two photos, the bookmark you see in photo one (i love how that turned out - has a batik feel to it) and the card shown above. For the card, i used my Liquitex inks and they did the job quite nicely.

So, for now, i'm going to keep plowing through. i've been here before, in the artistic muck, and i'll be here again. i will break out of this, i just hope it happens soon.

Celebrate snail mail!

Wow, almost a month since my last post. Didn't i mention something a few posts ago about wanting to update this more often? Yeah. And the main reason i've been MIA? Swap-bot. 

i used to swap a couple of years ago on other forums, but my artistic journey led me towards discovering new mediums and finding my own voice, and making art mostly for me. But, i missed swapping, for so many reasons - the anticipation of getting something fun in the mail, meeting other artists and crafters, finding inspiration and having a goal to work towards. i almost always work better with a goal, and that creativity spills into other artwork, and i am inspired more than i am not. i hate feeling blocked, almost as much as i hate boredom. On a side note, i've not felt bored in years. i remember as a teenager not liking to feel bored and seeing it as a waste of what precious little time we have on this planet. For as long as i can remember, my problem hasn't been having nothing to do, it's been not having enough time in a single day to act on all the things i want to do. Anyone who knows me fairly well, knows i always have an art project (or 10) in the works. Add to that a love of cooking and baking, reading, gardening, writing and the daily demands of housework and who has time to be bored? i don't accept boredom; life's too short.

So, i've been swapping, and having a lot of fun. And i'm thinking more about an etsy shop. The only thing stopping me from opening right now is not having a name. i want a name that's me, that's interesting and reflects the fact that i will be selling everything from handmade greeting cards to polymer clay jewelry to handmade blank journals. Oh, and it should be easy to spell and pronounce - that's important! Some people recommend finding a focus for your shop, but i don't see how i could limit myself to one or two items. There's so much i enjoy doing. See? Boredom can't live here. It wouldn't have breathing space.